Wednesday, May 14, 2008

are you kidding me?!



haha. these are hilarious...i cant believe people actually file lawsuits like these. they should be ashamed of themselves lol

Here are the Stella's for 2007:
7TH PLACE:
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her
peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running
inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by
the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

6TH PLACE:
Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles, California won $74,000 plus medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman
apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he
was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.

5TH PLACE:
Terrence Dickson, of Bristol, Pennsylvania was leaving a house he had just
burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic
garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to
open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the
garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to exist
for eight, count 'em, EIGHT, days on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry
dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental
anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson
$500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish!

4TH PLACE:
Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas garnered 4th Place in the Stella's
when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bit on the
butt by his next door neighbor's beagle รข€“ even though the beagle was on a
chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked
for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the
time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the
yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.

3RD PLACE:
Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania earned 3rd Place status because a
jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she
slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft
drink was on the floor? Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30
seconds earlier during an argument. Whatever happened to people being
responsible for their own actions?

2ND PLACE:
Kara Walton, of Claymont, Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a
nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor,
knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to
sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover
charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000...oh, yeah,
plus dental expenses. Go figure.

1ST PLACE: (May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please)
This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs. Merv
Grazinski, of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago
motor home. On her first trip home, from an OU football game, having
driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly
left the driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a
sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and
overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
putting in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's
seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are
you sitting down? $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually
changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski
has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.

-cris

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